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If my kids don’t stop whining I’m going to explode! Sound familiar?
All kids whine. And there is no behavior trait that can get under a parent.s skin quicker than whining.
I get many questions about whining like the following from a distraught mother, The whining feels like it is nonstop. I tell her I will listen to her when she can talk in a calm voice. It sometimes works, but I feel like a broken record – it is a big source of frustration for me.
The mother feels like a broken record for two reasons. First of all being a parent means we have to repeat ourselves a lot. It takes a long time for kids to learn to listen. But the major factor is that many parents unwittingly reinforce this obnoxious behavior because their kids simply don’t believe what Mom says so they don’t listen.
Yes, whining is a bummer but it can be minimized. Here are three anti-whining techniques that work. Try one or all until you find the one that works for you.
1) When the whining starts you morph into the world’s best actor. Put a huge smile on your face and using a very pleasant voice tell your kids that you simply cannot hear whining because your ears got broken but if they talk in a sweet voice you will be able to hear them. Be sure you role play so the kids know the difference. Then totally, but sweetly, IGNORE the kids when they are whining.
When they realize you mean what you say and they get hungry enough they’ll stop whining and ask for lunch in a sweet voice.
2) Put the whiner in the WHINING CHAIR. This is a chair in another room out of earshot. Tell the kids they can whine all they want there. This is not like time-out as the child can get out of the chair when the sweet voice comes back.
3) Tell the kids the kitchen or family room is a NO-WHINING ZONE. Every time they start to whine tell them they have to go to the whining room (most parents use the kids bedroom) until the whining attack is over.
For these techniques to work you must be CONSISTENT. Eventually your kids will realize you mean what you say and say what you mean.
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